Have you heard the term "psychological safety" before?
I'm reading Amy C. Edmondson's excellent book The Fearless Organization at the moment, and this is how she defines it:
Psychological safety is broadly defined as a climate in which people are comfortable expressing and being themselves. More specifically, when people have psychological safety at work, they feel comfortable sharing concerns and mistakes without fear of embarrassment or retribution. They are confident that they can speak up and won't be humiliated, ignored, or blamed. They know they can ask questions when they are unsure about something. They tend to trust and respect their colleagues.
Psychological safety isn’t just a buzzword—it’s essential for building a thriving, innovative workplace. But sometimes, the importance of safety only becomes clear when it’s missing.
Reflecting on my own career, I can pinpoint moments when I didn’t feel psychologically safe, and those experiences have shaped how I approach leadership today.
Here are five stories from my working life that taught me why driving fear out of the workplace is so important—and how we can do better.
1. Respect Boundaries and Emotions
Once, during regular catch-ups with my manager’s boss (let's call her Dee), I shared how my manager (let's call her Anne) had pressed me about some unnecessary work—right after I told her my father was unwell and I’d be travelling home to visit him.
I asked Dee to notify Anne about my unease, but that I didn't want to discuss it further. But the next week, Anne made me revisit the issue anyway, and used the conversation as an opportunity to defend herself rather than to empathise with my circumstances.
This experience underscored how vital it is for leaders to respect boundaries. Psychological safety means listening when someone sets limits and ensuring they feel supported, not pushed beyond their comfort zone.
2. Don’t Turn Introductions into Examinations
On my first day in my first full-time job, my manager had me introduce myself at an all-hands meeting and then go around the office asking every person their favourite drink.
It. Was. Excruciating.
I felt like I was being tested, not welcomed, and it made me reluctant to engage in the weeks that followed. I later found out that my manager had been reprimanded for having me ask my new colleagues about their drinking habits.
When leaders prioritise genuine connection over forced performances, they help new team members feel safe, not scrutinised. First impressions matter—don’t let fear define them.
3. Encourage Ideas Without Judgment
As a trainee archivist (yes, like many neurodivergent people I've sampled all kinds of vocations), I once suggested creating a Wiki page to streamline a project. My manager dismissed the idea with a sarcastic comment: “For God's sake, not everything has to be some fancy digital thing Lee.”
After that, I stopped offering suggestions altogether.
This taught me how damaging it is to shut down ideas. Even if a suggestion isn’t feasible, leaders can create psychological safety by valuing contributions and exploring possibilities. It’s about fostering curiosity, not stifling it.
4. Mocking Kills Trust
I was working at an office in a rural area where heavy snow was expected the following day. I mentioned that I'd be in the next day “weather permitting”, given that the forecast was looking pretty dire.
I'll never forget my manager repeating the phrase back at me in a mocking tone, in front of the rest of the team. I felt embarrassed and undermined.
Lo and behold, the next day the office was closed because of the snow. I doubt my manager gave a second thought for the way she spoke to me the previous day.
Small acts of ridicule can have a lasting impact on psychological safety. Respect is fundamental to trust, and trust is the foundation of effective teams. Even if you see something as "just banter", don't assume that the subject of your ridicule is in on the joke - especially when the power dynamic is not in their favour.
5. Isolation Is Not Productivity
After quitting my PhD, I felt lost for a while and eventually took a digital marketing role at a student accommodation company. My manager, not wanting me to be interrupted by students, isolated me in a meeting room adjacent to the reception area where my colleagues worked. I sat alone all day, while my team wondered why I wasn’t engaging with them.
I found the prospect of moving from a quiet room into a bustling social space overwhelming (something I now know is associated with my autism). I felt ashamed for not being able to overcome that barrier, and the pressure built until I quit after just eight weeks.
Looking back, I realise how much better that situation could have been with understanding and support—by allowing remote work or creating a more inclusive environment. Anything other than putting the new guy on his own in a meeting room with nothing but a laptop.
Silence rarely announces itself
These five stories remind me how much work environments shape our ability to contribute and grow. By respecting boundaries, encouraging ideas, avoiding mockery, and embracing differences, leaders can create workplaces where fear is driven out and everyone feels empowered to do their best work.
What’s one story from your career that’s shaped your perspective on psychological safety? I’d love to hear it—let’s start the conversation.
I'll close with this quote from The Fearless Organization:
The free exchange of ideas, concerns or questions is routinely hindered by interpersonal fear far more often than most managers realize. This kind of fear cannot be directly seen. Silence – when voice was possible – rarely announces itself! The moment passes, and no one is the wiser except the person who held back.
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